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Red Carpet Rankings: Costume Institute Gala

The annual Costume Institute gala is known as “the Party of the Year,” and this year’s fête, in conjunction with the opening of the amazing Poiret exhibit, was no exception. This is one event where anything goes fashion-wise, and creativity is encouraged. Some folks looked great, others made me want to close my eyes forever. Using the Celebrity Fashions of Stylesight, I’ve compiled my personal Red Carpet Rankings, from the good to the very bad.

Love!!!
jessicastam


Model Jessica Stam’s bejewelled Dior Couture gown by John Galliano channels Poiret’s decadence and artful draping perfectly. Her navy satin clutch, smoky eyes and tousled waves strike the perfect balance against the opulence of the dress, letting it take center stage. Winner!

marykate


The best part about Mary-Kate Olsen’s Giambattista Valli gown is how incredibly confident she looks in it. Feathers, leather corset, plunging neckline and all, MK manages to pull off a look that might have landed others on Worst Dressed lists around the world. Second Place!

juliette lewis


Were Paul Poiret’s wife and muse, Denise, to be re-incarnated, it wouldn’t shock me to find out that she had come back as actress and musician Juliette Lewis, who has always kind of done whatever she wants. Seen here in a Poiret-perfect vintage dress, what I’m really digging is her ability to rock this 20’s inspired headband, which is more than I can say for the NYU girls I see copping this look. Third Place!

lucyliu


Zac Posen gives me the willies, what with his dimples and curls and poses, but I can’t help loving this shockingly purple gown, seen here on the always fierce Lucy Liu. Honorable Mention!

Hate.

jessicasimpson


Proof that money can’t buy class (or a decent stylist), Jessica Simpson manages to do EVERYTHING wrong here, from makeup (those lips!) to hair (what color IS that?) to dress (Four words: Lady of the Night). Further proof that Jessica Simpson represents everything horrible about American pop-culture. Winner!

emily


Maybe Emily Mortimer fought a Muppet, killed it and made a dress out of its hide. Or maybe she’s wearing Chanel. Either way, it makes me die a little inside. Maybe if her shoes weren’t also blue I’d feel better about this outfit. Wait, no. Still dying inside. Also, check out a tanned Darc Jacobs lurking in the background with thief/actress Winona Ryder! Second Place!

kirtsendunst


Remember those old-timey photoplaces your parents made you go to, where you and your brother dressed up like cowboys and the loose women who kept bar for them and secretly loved it? Yeah, Kirsten Dunst found one that had vintage YSL, brought her newest ridiculous boyfriend with her (Johnny Borrell of Razorlight) and then stole the clothes. Third Place!

parkerposey


You know Parker Posey, I love you, but I’d look that unhappy too were I wearing such a horrible Darc Jacobs dress. Also, those are the EXACT SHOES I wore to my prom and I don’t want them back. Honorable Mention!

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  • alexander leger

    darc by darc jacobs!

  • i can’t wait till we go to the darc store in ptown. xo

  • jp

    oh my gosh, you are one funny girl. best laugh i’ve had all day.

    jp

  • Stam gets my vote!!! Beyond words stunning!

  • meow, parker! did you get into a fight and get your dress all tore-up?

  • ‘bias

    re Emily Mortimer: ZING! FTW

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